- let us know what you are doing so we can keep an ongoing list of activity
- work with us on how to improve the Toolkit experience
- encourage members of the meeting to use the Toolkit and resources (and add resources, etc.)
As you become familiar with the material, you are encouraged to get more people to join you. Each item offered in the Toolkit is distinct unto itself so no one will feel they have to catch up if they join in after you’ve been using it for a while. Use the kit at your own pace. It is not expected that you will use everything. The information is cumulative so the more you do the better.
However, sometimes groups feel the need to close membership when enough work has been done that they feel they need to stay as a unit, especially as this sometimes requires very personal and hard emotional as well as spiritual work. It can also be intimidating and sometimes fraught with uncertainty, discomfort, etc. We encourage groups who feel that need to see if someone (or more) from the group would meet with anyone interested to help them think about starting a new group and what has worked well in the original. Any encouragement from those who are already doing it can make a big difference to those considering getting involved or getting back into it after a time away.
We suggest groups that form to do this work establish some ground rules at the beginning, ideally getting the group’s agreement or “buy-in” at the start. These can help a group agree on how it will work together respectfully and effectively and establish trust.
Some of what is useful is:
- Cell phones should be turned off at the beginning of the workshop and should remain off until the end except during breaks.
- Listen actively — respect others when they are talking, listen and do not interrupt or cross-talk, i.e. talk to someone else when another person is speaking. The goal is not always to agree — it is to gain a deeper understanding.Try to hear the truth in what is said instead of looking for exceptions to the case.
- Speak from your own experience, personal experiences, personal opinion, thinking, instead of generalizing (use “I” statements rather then “they,” “we,” and “you”). t
- Participate to the fullest of your ability — Avoid blaming self or others for the misinformation we have learned, but do accept responsibility for not repeating misinformation after we have learned otherwise.
- Avoid side conversations – if you are unclear about the topic being discussed or the instructions, please ask the facilitator to clarify.
- Maintain confidentiality. All stories shared in this space stay in this space unless explicit permission is given by the person sharing the story that it can be shared in another setting.